Periods Are Annoying.

A Spectacular Suburban September: Day 5

State how your period makes you feel or what it makes you do. (30 points)

Every period is different and every woman’s period experience is different. The symptoms and motions might be similar but the experience is different.

Last month’s period was manageable while this month have me feeling like someone is taking a razor-sharp knife and sliding it across the walls of my uterus. Straight, no chaser, my period is trying to kill me.

I’m writing this in a rather odd-looking but comfortable position. Somehow, being seemingly bent out of shape and attempting not to move too many muscles feels better than having knife pain. It actually doesn’t feel too badly in this position.

Pain killers, you say? Laughable. My body chooses when to accept the medicine and when not to. Today is a “well, I don’t feel like accepting the medicine this pill is trying to give me” day. So, this bitch better brace herself.

I feel like I haven’t slept in days! The fatigue is real and though I’ve never been pregnant a day in my life, my goodness am I bloated. My stomach looks like I’m about 2 months pregnant. I feel fat and ugly and way more vulnerable than I do on a regular day. Don’t even get me started on the acne breakouts.

I snapped at a few people at work. I’ve been snapping at the people I work with. Now, I am once again the emotionally charged, hormonally imbalanced woman. Why am I even working while my period is trying to kill me?

Make menstrual leave (with acceptable and feasible policies and expectations) a thing! My period is trying to kill me and you expect that I’m gonna be optimally funtional. If you really think that then you’re an idiot. Period!!!

Every person who’s ever experienced torturous periods

Speaking of emotions, I’ve been sad and in the doldrums. Oh yeah, I’m little miss bawlie bawlie in my quiet corner. My trigger status is high as everything triggers a bawling session.

Abdominal cramps that extend into my back is also a thing. So, yay! 🙄 My head is about to explode and my digestive system is more sensitive than usual. So, best believe I will either be vomiting or having explosive diarrhea shortly.

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Other Suburban Girl JA ‘Period’ Blog Posts

Love Letter #54 | I Fell Off the Bed

Your period doesn’t have to be a painful experience

Love Letter #51 | Point Blank Period.

Love Letter #85 | Lessons From a Pixie Cup

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What Lessons Can Be Leanrt From Your Experience? (10 points)

Look here, just leave me alone and get me a period kit with my favourite snacks, pain killers, water, juices, a hot water bottle, period products, notes to cheer me up. I also need tissues and baby wipes – the flushable kind. Flavoured teas and candles better be in that kit too.

Buy extras because you’re gonna have to refill that kit.

Ask me if I’m okay and I’ll say I’m fine or that I’m great and everything is just spectacular. In reality, it feels like NOTHING is fine. I just want to curl up in a ball, ride out this round of the monthly experience and then get back to the life where my body prepares for it all over again for me to suffer again. The joys of being a woman or somebody who have periods. Such. Joy.

Grade: A, 40/30. 10 points added for realness. Period.

Signed (in red ink),

The Suburban Girl JA