I Stepped on a Crab and Avoided Being Pinched

A Spectacular Suburban September: Day 4

I accidentally stepped on a crab while gingerly stepping into the sea for an early morning dip at the beach. This, after feeling attacked by a variety of fish who were just curious about the human in their space. Poor ‘Sebastian’ looked like a rock too 😩. Chaotic.

Good Use of a Mental Break

Dear World,

A while back, I went on getaway by the beach along the north shores of Jamaica because life was getting a little too out of hand and I needed a mental break.

My days were filled with me sleeping in bed, laying on the beach, wading in the water, or enjoying the food. It wasn’t necessarily in that order but that was the general mode of operation.

It was truly relaxing.

Part of my self-help personal therapy is to get mentally captivated by natural bodies of water to give me perspective. The sea does that very well. Though I have thelassophobia, there’s just something about watching the deep blue (from a safe distance) that’s enthralling for me.

‘Beachy’ Blog Posts from The Suburban Girl JA

I lay on the beach and drank daiquiris and zoned out

My Place(s) Of Solitude

The beach was my 2021 refuge

Go to the beach…or the the river…or some waterfall

A road trip I’d like to take

My Fake Ariel Moments 🧜🏿‍♀️🧜🏿‍♀️🧜🏿‍♀️

So you know how Princess Ariel had her fish friends and her Crab friends ‘unda dah sea’? Well, no more than 3 feet from where the swash and backwash took place (the farthest out I’ll comfortably go on my own at the beach) schools of fish swam around and past me. They actually came so close I thought they were trying to say something. 😄. I was calm for maybe 2 minutes.

A sense of fear overcame me because these creatures were really curious and came way too close for comfort. I felt them on me. They were relatively big, but, in retrospect, they were really gentle. However, my mind blew everything out of proportion and I thought they were about to attack me. Know that i shrieked, yelped and screamed. 😂Mind you, there were different schools of fish here. At one end of the beach, I saw maybe 3 types and at the other, I saw three other types.

I witnessed a few crabs along the shoreline by the palm trees too. But they literally minded their business and didn’t bother me. I still watched them just to make sure.

The real Ariel would never. And to make matters worse, I have long and almost completely red locs too! The flipper, though, is that i can’t sing and I can’t swim 😩. Ugh, such a fraud.

I don’t know how I love to be out in nature when most things in nature scare me. It’s truly remarkably chaotic of me.

The Crab that Looked like a Smooth Sea Rock

‘Sebastian’. No, this isn’t the actual crab that I stepped on

One early morning during my mental break stay along the coast, I decided that I needed to be in the sea. As I put my things on the beach chair, I walked into the water. Low-key afraid that the fish would come towards me, I stepped gingerly in the sand as I looked into the clear sky-reflecting water as if I could outrun a fish in its habitat.


As I approached the distance of my liking, I noticed a rock that appeared smooth on top, so as I gingerly waded, I stepped on this rock like an idiot. Turns out that the rock wasn’t a rock at all.

It was a crab that was partially hidden under the sand.

Sebastian walked away grumpily after I disturbed his slumber. I apologised to him and immediately thought that homie could’ve pinched me! He didn’t. Thank King Triton, cause I really couldn’t handle another thing to scare me in nature.

Now I know you’re wondering why I would ever step on a single rock surrounded by sand in the sea. In that moment, my actions were similar to those people who see a room filled with empty seats and they choose to sit beside you, the only other person in the room. It was also silly because that rock could’ve been some other creature that would’ve harmed me. I couldn’t even tell you why I stepped on the poor crab.

In any event, you should know by now that some lessons were garnered from that near pinch experience.

Lessons from the Crab 🦀 that Didn’t Pinch My Feet and the Fish 🐟 that Didn’t Bite Me

  • If you’re scared, go in same way. Just do it gingerly. Sometimes the “go hard and done” mentality will get you nowhere but hurt. Approaching uncertain situations with calculated steps (and in some cases, missteps) can prevent you from being pinched in the long run.
  • For the love of all things sensible, avoid stepping on rocks in the sea. This is especially true for lone rocks surrounded by sand. It could be a trap and it could be that you’re disturbing a sea creature in their home. Can you imagine if the giant from the beanstalk stepped on you or your home?! 💀
  • Curious beings are not all dangerous. Don’t let ignorance allow you to act stupidly. Read the room and be self-aware. In my case, I was the stranger and I had the audacity to respond in the manner that I did. It was such a Karen moment. Don’t mistake an attack for curiosity either. People out here thinking they’re slick. Stay woke.
  • Be grateful that some folks will give you grace in your misdeeds and be reminded that being gracious to others ought to be part of your life. Though I didn’t step with a heavy foot, I still disturbed the crab. Sebastian could’ve literally lost his 💩 and pinched me but he didn’t. If that’s not a gracious crab then idk what is!

Yes, I am aware that some crabs prefer to scurry along rather than to attack. Just roll with the flow here. It makes for a better appreciation of the story and lessons if we all imagine that this crab was a fighter and decided that it was just not the day or time to be fighting.

Have you ever had a near punch experience in the real or figurative sense? What other lessons are there to learn here?


The Suburban Girl JA


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