Blogmas 2021 | 12 Days of Christmas | Day 8

Dear World,

Walking through rivers while wearing shoes and socks prepares you for life situations where you have to walk through metaphorical water and poop 💩 and muck to get to where you’re headed.

About a year ago I went on a hike through a path of the Blue and John Crow Mountain National Park in Jamaica. It was a path I had never been on and I went with some people I really didn’t know. All except one – my longtime friend and partner in crime (PIC), Jhean.

We hadn’t really trained for this adventure – but, in truth, of all the adventures we’ve been on, we trained for perhaps 10% of them. Haha! It’s bad, I know. However, these experiences give for much better stories to tell the kids.

So, we went on this hike and before we actually started the trail, we thought the car couldn’t take us because it was looking a little low on gas midway up the mountain. Best believe, it was a mixture of sporadic cackling and Jesus praises at the madness of if we would be broken down on the side of a mountain. The good in that was the breathtaking views we had.

Anyway, we made it up because the vehicle was being energy efficient. So, we got to the start point and needed to pee. We found a spot in the bush and did our thing. Somehow, I peed on my leg. Listen, it was on a slope and the gravitational pull forced the pee in the direction of my leg. That’s my story and I’m sticking with it.

Next, when the trek was really about to start, we had to cross a river (it wasn’t very wide and the water wasn’t gushing. It was safe enough). I think we crossed like two or three. At the first crossing, I took my shoes and socks off and for the others, I walked right through. It felt weird cause the only shoes I had ever worn in water was my beach shoes. I think that’s what they’re called. I’m not sure. My PIC, on the other hand walked through all the crossings like it was a normal day. She was not about to take off, walk through, dry off and put on again. That was not efficient use of energy. She was right.

Following our interesting start to the trek, we were hit by what felt like a tonne of bricks due to high altitude, poor breathing techniques and, of course, being unfit. I’m convinced were a little high from altitude sickness cause at certain parts of the trail, we fully thought we’d roll down the never ending precipice or just curl up and die.

While we felt that that way, we were also captivated by the beauty around us. Listen, it was a temperamental experience.

Midway up, I literally had an internal self talk to say, “bish! Don’t ever do this again!” – but of course, I’ve done hikes and treks since then. I never learn. 😅

At one point, my PIC had difficulty moving cause her unfit self had muscles failing on her. My unfit self sweat profusely. My calves hurt but I was walkable. But…the sweat!! Like, you could probably get a bucket of water just from the sweat that I ‘swot’.

Then at another point, I wanted to pee but then the feeling to poop also came. Me and my stush self decided that we could ask someone who lived along the trail to use their bathroom. Our guide, who was familiar with the space stood watch and my PIC stood second watch. It wasn’t the most sanitary and I gagged but I was able to relieve myself. I kept telling myself that I’d have a nice long shower when I got home. That was my incentive.

After that dramatic experience for my butthole and germophobia, I think we had a decent hike going up the trail for a good little while. We did really well. It was comparatively uneventful until we started to make our way back. While we did that, Jhean and I held each other up – literally.

The downhill trod aggravated an old injury to my back and my knee. Can I tell you, I was next to tears. I ended up on some strange dude’s bike back and he taxi me down the hill where I laid by another community member’s shop and waited on the trekking folks to come get me.

I wasn’t scared, I was only tired and beat up cause of the stress of the day. 😂. Despite all that, my spirits were high. I was by myself with the shop owner and a stray puppy.

My PIC and the rest of the group got to me and we made our way back into the city. Jheanbug and I headed straight for Burger King 🤣. We bought ourselves some ice cream and a meal and headed home. We earned it, dammit!

It took us like a full week to completely restore our bodies because of the shock of it all.

I shared that story to say this – uncomfortable situations will definitely come your way. Some of the times, these situations will come because of lack of preparation and others will happen just because that’s how life is. The best way to make it through and cross over is ultimately with a positive attitude. That’s it, really. So, when you have to cross a river or two, or you accidentally pee on yourself as a grown adult with control over your faculties, know that that’s how life is sometimes. Cry if you want, get sad if you want, ask for help if you need it. Just don’t give in and don’t give up.

Another thing about this entire experience speaks to the level of my relationship with the PIC, she literally asked if I wanted to hike just a few days prior and I said “bet”. With little to no preparation. Sometimes in life, you have to just go for it. You don’t want to live a life that you actually didn’t live. Say yes more and seek adventures. Seek some level of discomfort too. It adds to the dramatic effect and the euphoria knowing that you did that.

Alright. This one was a mouthful. Read this and read it again. Take from it what you will. All the grammar ninjas out there, mind your business eh. This is my telling of my story. Thanks.

*These thoughts and experiences are my own and they’re not necessarily supported by any real empirical evidence. Great, glad to have gotten that out the way.

Signed with love,

The Suburban Girl JA