Love Letter #73 | Germs!

Dear World.

Has anyone ever coughed or sneezed in your direction?

Nine out of 10 chances it was an accident.

Five out of ten chances, they don’t think their germs spread easily.


As far as you’re concerned, this disgusting – walking- open- petri dish released their bad bacteria in your air and you feel like death is now closer than you anticipated.

If you said yes or shook your head in agreement to any of the above:

You’re me. I am you. We’re pretty much the same person.

Hi! My name is Candice and I’m your average germophobe. I’m not fond of shaking hands or hugging complete strangers. I’m not a fan of embracing those who sneeze and cough out their ailing lungs.

I’m not a fan of being trapped in enclosed spaces for any extended period with recycled air and sick people all around me.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not the cleanest person around but I’d rather sit and marinate in my own germs and the germs of my loved ones than to open up to folks I don’t know and contract strange people’s germs. Because, I’m already acclimatised to my germs and the germs of my loves.

It’s not safe either, but i’ll take those chances.

I’m about to share a few instances where my relationship with germs have affected my behaviour.

The Commute

My daily commute usually has me sitting on the edge. I can never truly relax.

There’s always that one or two person(s) coughing or sneezing with the descriptive sounds of dry, wet and mucus-filled. Some of these people release their germs in the palms of their hands and then they transfer it unto handle bars and fabrics and skin.

After that germ transfer, unsuspecting folks touch the same surfaces and the situation then becomes a game of ‘pass roun donkey germs’.

I usually sit uncomfortably and watch all this unfold.

I cringe at every cough and sneeze as my skin hairs stand up during live action germ transfer. And, I gag for at least 30-45 minutes…maybe longer (the general duration of my commute).

I recall recently becoming the thing which I feared the most.

Yes, yours truly became that disgusting walking bad bacteria petri dish.

The difference with me was that I had my antibacterial wipes and I never touched the surfaces around. I covered my nose and mouth as best as I could and I disposed of the tissues in a little bag within my pocket book. You know… being the model sick person.

And then.

There was a sneeze that I could not control. I released everything. I felt my soul leave my body as I kick started a live action sequence.

If eyes could kill, I’d be dead before my virus could take a better hold of my immyne system.

“So, this is what it’s like to transfer germs? Okay.”

“Bless You”

You know how after a sneeze others say “Bless You”? I never really understood why.

Is it a “bless the germs that you’ve put into the air”? Or a “bless the person(s) about to catch your germs”?

I really don’t know.


I go to a church that ‘shares the peace’. For those of you who don’t know, in sharing the peace, you shake hands and hug and rub shoulders with friends and strangers…sisters and brothers in Christ and you say “peace of the Lord be with you”.

Because of who I am, I’ve always disliked this practice.

Since the rise of the near pandemic new Coronavirus strain – #COVID19 my germ attena is in overdrive.

So, I stay away. The last time I went to church (about 3-4 weeks ago). I literally pulled out my hand sanitiser and anti-bacterial wipes during the peace sharing segment.

After every touch, I either pumped or wiped.

And, believe me when I say – I couldn’t care less if I’m deemed to have no tact.

Self preservation comes before all these people. Point blank period.

I often feel like I’m at war. Who will win? Me or the germs? I vote me.

This was not meant to inspire or motivate. I honestly wanted to talk germs with you.

Lessons in Germ Reduction

1. Prayer works and all…but – Wash your damn hands! #Soap #Water #Friction

Wash for at least 20 seconds. And, sing the Happy Birthday song when you do it. Your version of the song might differ from mine and I can’t be bothered with differentiating songs. So, hear what, sing your favourite song and when you reach the hook, you’re in the safe zone.

2. Stop touching your damn face!

3. For the love of God! Cover your nose and mouth when you cough and sneeze. Don’t do it in bare hands!

4. Cough and sneeze in tissue paper and dispose of it right away!

5. Please do away with the face masks. They literally serve no purpose.

6. Properly sanitise your spaces. And….those cute Bath and Body Works sanitisers are nice but they’re not as close to powerful as the Purell brand. (Know any other? Drop them in the comments).

7. Lysol, Chlorox, Soap, Water, Bleach, Disinfectant. #ThatsAll

8. Use paper towel or some other disposable material to open and close doors, drawers or touch public surfaces.

9. Give your immune system some armour in the war against germs and increase your vitamin C intake.

10. Stay away from sick persons. Call it scorning them if you wish. But, avoid them like the plague!

11. If you feel sick, stay your ass home. Make sure you visit your doctor as well.

Alright now:

How are you during the spread of COVID19?

Have you increased your cleanse routine?

Signed with germ free love,

The Suburban Girl


2 Comments Add yours

  1. petchary says:

    I am not particularly a germaphobe, I have to say, but all of this is good advice! As for Lysol etc., I don’t think they are going to make much difference, but if it makes you feel better… Stay well!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Emma! Haha. Just doing my job to spread the good advice on reducing germs.
      Stay well also 🤗

      Liked by 1 person

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