Dear World,

I notice that many people – in my life and those who respond to today’s writing prompt – speak about “what makes you nervous” in monolithic language. In reality, at least for me, being nervous does not exist by itself. In order for nervousness to occur in my world, a sense of fear and anxiety are also present alongside a stimulant that triggers a negative reaction from me.

That means the fear of the unknown, fear of a negative outcome, possible response, feedback, and even consequences (all unknown), or even the other psychologically seeming illogical fear of a thing or concept – a phobia . It’s also about anxiety inducing bodily and mental reactions when I’m not as prepared as I wanted to be, when I see 10-times more people in an audience when I was prepared for half of what’s actually there. It’s about confrontation with a known manipulator or someone who has more power over me, it’s about standing up for myself when there’s no one else there to support me when my voice cracks under pressure and my throat closes, my eyes well with tears, or when stomach gets knotted.

Will I get into details and be explicitly specific with the laundry list of “what makes me nervous”? No, I will not. Instead, I will broadbrush this response and leave it open for interpretation. If you’re reading this and you know me, then you’ll understand more about certain reactions I have in situations. If you think you know me and you’ve decided that the one time I cried or sweated profusely was because of nervousness or anxiety, trust me, you’re mistaken, it was something else.

I consider fear, anxiety, and nervousness the crippling trio that colludes to be the enemy sent to fight against your prosperity. If you’re not equipped to properly handle the crippling trio, you’ll either freeze, or fall flat on your face, and I know all about those experiences.

The crippling trio have triggered severe panic attacks that have left me physically shaken and mentally broken for days, weeks, and even months. They have also left me feeling inadequate and feeling like a stupid person and a failure. However, with time, experience, and guidance, I am better able to handle them alongside whatever stimulant they present themselves with, and I have come out victorious – still shaken, but having actually completed whatever task that was set before me.

The truth is, it’s natural to be nervous and to feel all that comes with nerves, and fear, and anxiety. I personally don’t believe that you truly get over it, especially as a naturally anxious person. So, it’s more about management of the feelings and consistently identifying means, ways, and structures in my life to see me through them to be functional.

Anyway, what makes you nervous? Share if you’re comfortable doing so.

Signed,

The Suburban Girl JA®