Editor’s Note:

Dear World,

Jermaine, a wonderful human and I met quite a few years ago through volunteerism. I remember it being a seamless connection through a dose of uncontrollable laughter after we painted a pre-school for Jamaica’s Labour Day activities. Either way, that connection has grown over the years and now we root for each other while encouraging growth for one another.

As part of series of The Suburban Guest blog posts, Jermaine Peart or JP, as she sometimes likes to be called, shares words on giving and receiving love! She’s no stranger to us here at The Suburban Girl JA®. In fact, she has previously contributed a guest post – Chicken Batty Out A Door in 2020 when she used a former tag, A Country Girl in Kingston on her platform, italreasons. Now, in 2025, she’s back with a more refined approach to life and provides deeper insights with her writing.

Thanks, JP. We love you for using the prompt about love and sharing your take on it.

Though the messages written, edited, and shared by Suburban Guests may resonate with The Suburban Girl JA®, they are not our own and they do not necessarily reflect the thoughts and ideals we value.

Signed,

The Suburban Girl JA®

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Prelude to Love

Who will I love this Valentine’s Day? 🤔

I thought this would be the year I wouldn’t be singing, “Valentine is coming… where is your boyfriend?” But life—specifically, the Alpha and Omega—had other plans.

Today, I want to acknowledge that while I’m single, I recently encountered a love that connected me to different perspectives in life and I’d like to experience it again.

I’ve received a love so profound that it has me singing Whitney Houston’s He Fills Me Up and agreeing with Babyface when he said, “Every time I close my eyes, I thank the Lord that I found you”.

And I meant it.

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Looking back, I realise that before experiencing the aforementioned love, I entertained what I thought was better for me—but it actually wasn’t. I ventured down paths with some pursuers, only to be grateful that I eventually took a detour.

There were some I mourned silently and others I vented about to friends and family. But comparing them to this love? Whew! I dodged a few bullets!

Let me describe this love. It’s not like Maroon 5, but more like K-Ci & JoJo belting out “All My Life“.

This has taught me that:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-7

It sounds beautiful, but to achieve this level of love takes work. Constant work.

Lessons from Love

Three Cs to Sustaining Relationships in Love

Compromise – Communication – Complimenting

Compromise is vital for the sustenance of any relationship. Right behind it? Communication— not just talking but having the patience to truly understand each other’s responses and the changes in behaviour that follow.

Speak to the King/Queen in them. You have no idea how your words and actions keep them grounded in a world that constantly tells them they are not enough.

Compliment them. Thank them for listening to your concerns. Share in something they cherish. Even a simple, thoughtful gift can go a long way. Everyone wants to feel appreciated — that’s why Valentine’s Day is one of the most celebrated days, right?

Vulnerability: A Requirement in Love

Apologise…I’m laughing as I write this 🤭 because I’m realising — I’m not as understanding or patient as I think I am [when it comes to conflict and discomfort].

Be vulnerable. Vulnerability allows you to address problems openly and work through them. It helps you become less reactive and more assured that things will be okay.

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If you’re not ready to commit, leave people alone.

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You won’t get it right all the time, but what truly matters is that both of you are willing to work through it—together. Your partner can support you, but the heart work? That’s on you.

We all need a solid foundation for strong relationships. For me, that foundation is Jesus Christ. During tough moments, I lean on Him for understanding:

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Love Yourself First

Love yourself enough to recognise that what you’re receiving no longer aligns with you.

If it’s abuse—whether emotional, physical, or mental—or if your efforts are constantly overlooked, step away.

Make room for real heart work so that you don’t misidentify love-bombing, trauma bonds, or bad behaviour as love.

Epilogue in Love

Will I be celebrating Valentine’s Day? YES!

Why not? I am still worthy of love—even if it’s a solo day. If someone can’t love me in a relationship, why should I stop loving myself just because that love looks differently?

I am still worthy. Love has never left me.

So, who will I love this Valentine’s Day? Jesus and myself.

I hope we all receive a love that makes us hope again—and one that we want to share with the world.

Connect with Jermaine on Instagram @ms_jermaine and on Threads @ms_jermaine